WHEN DRAGONBALL Z MEETS COWBOY BEBOP
by DJ-Insecticide
Summary: i dunno, read the damn thing and find out! its not very good, seeing as how its me first...


WHEN DRAGONBALL Z MEETS COWBOY BEBOP  
  
Goku sat in his humble abode.peacefully stuffing his face with a bowl of some unidentified.assumedly oriental.probably rice related food.stuff. ANYWHO! ON WITH THE STORY! The point is the bastard was stuffing himself. Well, as he gorged himself at an almost blasphemous rate, he heard his son calling to him from his room. "DADDY! COME QUICK!" in a voice muffled from food, he called back, "What do you want?"  
"I need to tell you something!" Goku thought for a second, then set down the bowl, and walked over to his son's room. "What is it Gohan?"  
"Well, it's kinda hard to explain."  
"SPIT IT OUT, DAMN YOU!"  
"OK, OK! Well, you see.one of Mr. Satan's (to all of you who HAVEN'T seen the uncut version, that is Hurcule's real name. get used to it.) illegitimate kids was saying you were a pansy. So I called him a bastard. So he punched me."  
"Gohan, do me a favor and get to the point."  
"I blasted his ass with a Kemehameha so big, he was vaporized." Goku sat in stunned silence. Gohan could see his father's face twitching with barely controlled rage. "Well.are you sorry?" He said through a tightly clenched jaw."Y.yes."  
"Well, in the eyes of the law.THAT'S NOT GOOD ENOUGH!!!!" Gohan covered his head protectively. "I'm not gonna hit you, you little pansy, stop hiding!"  
"Y-Yes s-s-sir."  
"Now, do you know what happens nowadays, when you commit a crime?"  
"The police come?"  
"NOT FOR A MURDER THIS HORRIBLE! Their gonna send bounty hunters after us." Gohan sat for a second. "What the hell is a bounty hunter?"  
"A bad man like Vegeta who wants to take daddy away. And now, their after you." (Wondering what he means by taking daddy away? WELL TO DAMN BAD! KEEP READING!) Gohan trembled. "W-will they kill me?"  
"No, crap-for-brains, you're one of the strongest beings in the frickin' universe!" Gohan covered his head again. "Look me in the eyes, Gohan." He complied. "You're gonna be just fine, ok?"  
"OK."  
"Daddy wont let anything happen to you."  
"Thanks, Dad." They hug, its all very touching, la-dee-freakin-da! No- one wants to hear that wishy washy bullcrap. You want some blood, don't you, you psychopath? WELL TOO BAD! Keep reading, and you'll see what the end of this is.  
The next day, the infamous Spike Spiegel sat in the Bebop, scratching his nappy head of hair, and wishing his hangover would go away. He smelled something atrocious wafting down the hallway towards him. He followed it. In the main room; Ed, and Faye were sitting at the table, staring at a pile of horrifically burned things that used to be food. Jett was in the kitchen area, wearing his chef hat and apron, spraying a pan with a fire extinguisher. Faye poked at the "food" nervously, and slipped some over to Ein. Ein sniffed it, whimpered, and ran away with his tail between his legs. Ed giggled, and loped off after him. Faye gave a tremendous groan, and threw her plate into the garbage. "What was wrong with it?" Jett asked innocently. "WHAT WAS WRONG WITH IT!?!? WHAT WASN'T WRONG WITH IT!?!? THAT WASN'T EVEN FOOD ANYMORE!!!"  
"Yeah, Jett, we need a job, so we can get some cash." Spike chimed in, as he lit up a cigarette. He held the pack out to Jett and Faye, and they each accepted one. They then heard the computer beep loudly. Spike leaped up, and turned it on. "What is it?" he asked. The cop replied, "On some weird planet that looks kinda like Earth, something weird happened, and now a guy is dead.yeah." Spike stared puzzled at the screen. "How much is it worth?" The cop started righting. "This many," he held up a sign with "a bajillion" written on it. "Can I have my donut now?"  
  
The Bebop landed soundly on the surface of the strangely colored planet. They soon noticed that they were on top of a HUMONGOUS tower! A fat black man approached them. "Hello, I am Mr. PoPo. I am the only black man here on this planet. Isn't it silly that I'm a slave?" Spike stared, dumbfounded at the man's obvious stupidity, and got back in the ship. They took off, and landed on solid ground. They were right in front of a house. An obscenely muscled man with horrid bulging eyes, and the stupidest hair ever walked out. "Hiya, I'm Goku. What can I do for ya?"  
"Wow, Spike, I thought you had the craziest hair in the galaxy." Jett whispered. "Shut up," hissed Spike, "This freak and his kid are the ones we're after."  
"Well, what are you here for?"  
"We're bounty hunters, and you're under arrest." Goku dropped his jaw. "GOHAN, GET OUT HERE!" Gohan came running out. "Time to kick some ass, Gohan!"  
"Alright!" Spike looked at the two weirdoes, as a strange fire surrounded them. He pulled out his gun. "What is that thing?" Goku said. "It's a gun, idiot." Replied Spike coolly, as he cocked back the hammer. "What does it do?" BLAM! A bullet thudded into Goku's chest, killing him dead. "NOOO!" Gohan screamed. He then began to scream. "ARRRRRRRR." ( 20 days later) Spike, Faye, and Jett woke up to find the child still screaming, and his hair was turning blonde. "What in the hell is he doing?" Asked Jett. "I dunno, self bleaching his hair?" Faye mused. "Fuck this, I'm gonna shoot his ass." Stated Spike, and he fired three rounds into his chest, ending the noise. "Well, let's go get our money.  
  
Upon their return to Earth; Spike, Faye, and Jett were given the Nobel Peace Prize, for ending the lives of two of the most annoying creatures ever to walk the anime wasteland.  
  
Now, I know I didn't explain anything, and its confusing, and some may even say it sucks, but do I care? NO. I'm gonna keep belting out random shit making fun of crappy anime's I don't like, until I get too old to do so. As you can see, I like Cowboy Bebop. I do not like DBZ. There, that's one argument settled. If you'd like to see another anime fight another, email me, if you think I suck, email me, if you think I rock, email me. Whatever. Eventually I might get my own site to post my originals on. Anywho, I'm done with this pile of crap! 


End file.
